What Caballo Blanco Means to Me

I am an engineer. There is no denying that. I was an engineer back when I thought that was someone who drove a train. I was an engineer before I understood what my dad (a chemical engineer) did. I have 2 degrees in engineering.  Yet, I have never worked as an engineer.

Maybe that is why Born to Run struck a chord with me.  I study things to increase my understanding, to make myself more well rounded, to become a better person. Born to Run taught me things about running and about myself that I believe made me a better person. The story of Micah True or "Caballo Blanco" was a key part if that journey. It may be a truly great story or just a cheap literary device.  Either way, for many of us who read the book, it was what sucked us in - the tale of this intriguing mystery man who disappeared into the desert to run with the greatest running people in the world.  The science in the book facinated me, but the people in the book are what helped cement my love for running.

Caballo Blanco was, I believe, every runner. Everyone who runs will eventually have those moments when they are one with the world. Their minds empty and they think of nothing - not work, not family, not friends, not breathing, not pace, not turnover, not PRing or BQing - nothing. There is only their body, in that place, at that time, moving through the world like the crawling ants, the falling leaves, the flowing streams. It doesn't matter if you are on a secluded trail in the middle of nowhere or in the middle of the lower Manhattan financial district during rush hour, you can still find those moments. I like to believe that is what Caballo was looking for and found in the Copper Canyons: a connection to himself and to the planet through running and those peaceful, loving people who made it the center of their culture.

This may be a grandios interpretation of someones poetic license of a really bad situation, but that isn't important. Regardless of how much of Born to Run is fact and how much is fiction, it is full of truth.  It is a story about things as runners we all already know. Because it surrounds these things with history and scientific studies and intriguing personalities makes it entertaining and believable, but it is telling us things we already know because we feel them.

Because of this, I know one thing: we should not morn the death of Caballo Blanco for long. When he left on that 12 mile run last week, I believe he knew it could be his last. I believe if you told him there was a good chance he would die in the woods that day, even if you told him he would certainly die that day, he still would have run. I think deep down we all know that every time we hit the trail or the road, it could be the last time. People who don't run mock the runners who drop dead of heart attacks in the middle of their runs. I know. I used to be one of the mockers. Now I understand. They could have had that heart attack on their couch or in their office. They could have been hit by a car or struck by lightning.  When their time came, they could not escape. What they could do in the mean time is run.

I believe Micah True knew that more than anyone. I believe he understood what running means to everyone who runs. I also believe he understood how running unites people. When is the last time you saw a marathon winner turn around and taunt the second place finisher? How many times have you seen them embrace? I think that is what we should think of when we think of Micah True or Caballo Blanco - that he has crossed the finish line and now is there to cheer us all on.

Am I a Distance Runner?

That title might sound odd considering I ran a marathon and a half last year, but I never liked those distances and wondered what my ideal race distance was.

Running is an evolutionary process. Lately, though, I felt like I was de-evolving. Then I started thinking maybe I am going through a metamorphasis. Whenever I played sports, I always had a little something extra in the tank. If I ran, I always had a kick. Once I started running, I enjoyed the long runs but LOVED the 5k. I loved being able to just go out "fast" and kick at the end. I loved speed work and tempo runs.

Lately I have been getting slower. At first I thought this was a bad thing. Then tonight during my speed work I started thinking that a big part of what I have been "losing" is my kick. Then I started thinking, maybe I haven't lost anything. Maybe my effort has increased throughout my run so I don't have anything left for a kick.

I am unquestionably slower. Training for a half has caused me to lose speed I had when I was training for 5ks. Not training for anything has definitely not helped lately which is why I got back on "the plan" tonight. However, if anything has improved it is my consistency. And maybe that means I am turning into a distance runner.

Scary.

Wined and Dined

Last night (and for most of us at least a little bit into this morning) was the Disney Wine and Dine half marathon and after party at EPCOT. For me, this race was much more than that. I think my running story is a bit abnormal since I went from non-runner marathoner without any sort of natural progession in my running. All of my significant growth as a runner came after my marathon.

However, this growth didn't come without a price. I have been training for something or other for over a year. I went from marathon training to back-to-back 5k plans and started training for this half before I finished my second 5k schedule. I wasn't training to finish races any more. I wasn't training to just get past some distance. I was training to get faster. It worked in spades for my 5k and, in comparison to my marathon pace, it worked for my half as well.

In typical newbie fashion, my goal pace for my half was almost completely arbitrary. Having done a 4:30 marathon, my next milestone was 4:00. When they guy working at the running store said he ran a half and didn't train but still finished under 2:00, I decided that was my goal. A 9:00 pace had gotten pretty easy for me so when I started my half training I decided a 9:00 pace was a good target. Everything went fine for the first few weeks. Then the weather got hot and I fell apart. My long runs were miserable and I was fighting to just finish. The conditioning I had from marathon training seemed to have disappeared during my 4-5 months of 5k training. Then in all the heat I felt like I forgot how to run fast too. As I got closer to the race I started to doubt my ability to get under 2:00. As cooler weather came literally the night of my race, I knew I would be able to gain some speed but was still nervous.

The race started at 10:00 PM so that the after party at EPCOT could start after the riff raff...I mean tourists ;) had left the park. That meant that yesterday was one of the longest days of my life. After my parents arrived to watch the kids, we headed out for lunch and then down to ESPN Wide World of Sports to meet up with my wife's cousin and her husband. My wife's cousin-in-law was also running in the race (his first half and longest distance) and the wives were going to be enjoying the party at EPCOT. Then we headed to the hotel to check in and kill time until the race. Around 7:00 we got on the bus to head for the starting line. I was sitting at the front of the bus as all the runners were boarding when I saw a Garmin 305 pass in front of my face. That is when I realized mine was sitting on the floor of the hotel room plugged into the charger. I went from anxious and somewhat relaxed to completely stressed out. After going back to the room to get my watch, we met up with some more folks loosely related to my wife and headed out to the starting line. I don't remember exactly when we got there, but my guess is it was before 8:00 so we had to kill around 2 hours.

The starting area was about as much fun as a field surrounded by port-o-lets could be. They had music pumping out of a pretty serious sound system so it sounded like the world's biggest (and most casually dressed) wedding reception. I did a little 10 minute warmup and then around 9:30 I headed for my start corral and tried to find my pace compadres. I didn't want to be too close to the front, but didn't want to be stuck in traffic either. I settled in around the middle surrounded by some groups, some couples, but immediately surrounded by 4 other people who were by themselves like me and appeared to be equally nervous.

The start of Disney races is always fun. They had a "Disney Recording Artist" sing the national anthem. There was a lone wheelchair participant who started at 9:58 with their own set of fireworks. The first corral of runners started at 10:00 and then we started around 10:05.

The start was a little slower than I remember the marathon being. I immediately got concerned that I might miss my goal by seconds due to being held up at the beginning. I tried to just stay relaxed and not burn too much energy weaving around but still hopped up on the grass for a while to get around some of the traffic.

Somewhere in there, my shoe came untied. This was a first for me in my fledgeling running career. Believe it or not I had never had a shoe come untied on the road and definitely not on a race. I took note of the time. I think it took something like 17 seconds to tie it.

The course was more fun than the full - started at EPCOT, ran to and through Animal Kingdom, and then through Hollywood Studios on the way back to EPCOT and the finish. There were several overpasses on the roads between parks which gave a good opportunity to conserve energy on the way up and fly on the way down. I tore it up on the downhills regularly breaking 7:30 according to my Garmin.

The ending was strangely familiar from the full - through Disney's Boardwalk into the back entrance of EPCOT. However, instead of wobbly legs feeling like I would barely be able to walk much less run across the finish, I was going to be putting in some of my fastest miles of the race. I found a woman who was running what I felt like was a good pace. More importantly, I felt like I could beat her. I stayed on her shoulder for the last mile or so. Once I hit a bridge around the back of EPCOT, I powered down it and left her behind for good. I split mile 13 in 8:33 - the fastest split of the race - and finished with a 1:58:39.

The party after was great. Got a free can of beer (ok, that was the low point) and had a gift card good for food/beverage that I used for a pint of Guinness and some other food (and of course spent more than the gift card was for). We didn't plan on staying until the 4:00 AM closing time but by the time we made our way out of the park, most of the people were leaving as it was pretty darn close. Definitely going to make this an annual race for as long as I can.

By the way, it is now May 31, 2012. The race started on October 1, 2011 and just today realized that I never finished this post. I have obviously been neglecting this blog.

It Starts Today!

It should have started this morning. In a way it did. It was the first day back at work after a long weekend (and another slow, sweaty, long run). It was a fight to get up at 5:00-ish AM. Temps were in the 80s before sunup. My knee was a bit tweaked so even walking was interesting to say the least. Just getting out and running was quite the accomplishment so doing 2x2000 sub-8 intervals is pretty damn good even if the plan was for 3x2000.

It wasn't good enough though.

So today is the day I start training for my race. That may sound odd considering I have less than 4 weeks left and have already been training for 15. I have been training to run a half marathon. I have been training to be faster than my full marathon and 15k (my only "long" race benchmarks). I have been training to break 2:00 - to become a "real" runner by my own artificial standard. I have NOT been training to RACE for 13.1 miles.

As most recreational runners know, only a few elite athletes race to win - especially in big races. Everyone else races themselves. Even if they are racing a friend/rival or pacing someone or just trying to finish, they are racing their own demons - the things that drove them to run in the first place or new lurkers discovered only after becoming a runner. For me it is the latter - I know I do not run as hard as I can. I'm hot, I'm tired, I'm thirsty. These are facts. These are things I cannot change. But there is one thing that is 100% in my control and that is how hard I try. I have wanted to try harder and to run faster, but it was easier to make excuses. The excuses end today.

Today is the day I start training my mind. I don't want to run 13.1 in 1:59:59. I sure as HELL don't want to run it in 2:00:01! Here is my goal:

1:57:40

For those keeping score at home, that is an 8:59 pace. It may not seem like much, but that is 10 sec/mi faster than 2:00:00. Most importantly, that is more than a full minute per mile faster than my marathon pace from earlier this year and 59.5 seconds per mile faster than my 15k from just under a year ago. That is a BIG difference. That is a gargantuan difference!

Anyone who has run a long race (or just a long run) with any sort of accurate timing knows that your pace varies even if only slightly. To average 8:59, you have to run a mile under for every mile you run over, second-for-second. That means, I will very likely need to be uncomfortable for several miles. I can't simply just run easy for 13.1 and then say, "Well, I finished a half marathon." when I am done.

So it starts today! Today is the day that I start training my mind for my race. Today is the day I stop letting excuses and weakness enter my mind and train it to fight through the pain and the tired legs and burning lungs. The picture I am building in my mind is me finishing my race with nothing left. I know I am strong enough, fast enough, have put in enough miles, done enough intervals, trained through the hottest part of the summer. I will not jog, I will not just run, I will not just finish, I will RACE for 13.1 miles and when I am done I will have won.

Florida Fallen Heroes 5k

Today was the "Florida Fallen Heroes" 5k in Tallahasse. This was a late sign up for the wife and I. We were already planning a trip up here when we found out one of the wife's clan was doing this race. After wengot here, he mentioned that part of the race was trail. I had no ideaand had just assumed it was along the roads in the park.

The race site (Maclay Gardens State Park) is a very pretty (and somewhat hilly) park. The start/finish was at a parking lot near a lake with a nice picnic pavillion. Mrs. L and I met up with her cousin's hubby and after walking down to the start area, registering, and getting our shirts, I loosened up with a little jog up and down the last few hills on the course.

After a moment of silence and presentation of the colors, they had a nice rendition of the national anthem and we headed to the start. The course was a lollipop out from the main parking lot to the trail section loop and then back.

The start was kind of sudden. I think I had already started running purely on instinct before I realized someone had actually said "start". The start was a pretty good hill so I took it easy and settled in with what seemed like my pace group. I was running at a very easy pace, attacking the downhills and relaxing up. That kept me pretty steady in my group. Some would pass me on the ups and I would fly back by on the downs.

We ran out of pavement around 0.75 mi or so and so that's where I lost my trail virginity. Hit the first mile marker and I didn't have a watch so I yelled out to see if anyone had a time. "8 minutes" is what came back so I felt pretty good about that.

Most of the people around me were huffing and puffing so I stepped on the gas a bit for the second mile. This was pretty flat and the trail footing was good. I started reeling people in in spite of the narrow trail. I felt kind of bad passing the ones in fatigues and boots but tried to make up by shouting some attempted encouragement (Good job! Keep it up! I couldn't run in those boots!).

Mile 3 was back through the hilly road section. I had a few folks pass me up here but not knowing how I would do on the hills, I stuck with my strategy and tried to hang in with help from the downs. I knew the finish was a big downhill for probably 200m so I knew I would reel in some more huffers and puffers with my kick. That included a guy I passed while he walked up a hill only to have him pass me on the flat top and a (slightly) older guy who eeked by and put about 30m between us.

I turned the last corner (which happened to be the top of the last hill) and hit he jets. I don't remember the last time I ran that fast. I was hootin' and hollerin' as I passed the folks who had passed me on the hills (out of exertion, not gloating). Hill walker was one of the first and I counted them off and had gray hair (again, just slightly more than me) in my sights and really opened it up. My goal (having nohing to base it on) was 25:00. I edged out gray hair right before the finish (which earned me a "you dog!") and crossed at 24:45 (7:59 pace).

Catching my breath required more "Whooooo!"s and so I apologized to the volunteers and other finishers after I regained my composure. After giving gray hair a fist bump and a "good race" I headed over to turn in my time and grab some water. I got to the finish in time to pull out my phone and get video of Mrs. L and cuz's hubby - so I thought. Ends up phone was set for still pics. Got picture of each at the top of the hill (when I thought I started the video) and the clock after they finished (when I thought I stopped the video).

Wifey PRed big time! 31:06 missing 10:00 pace by 6 sec. Previous best was around 33 or 34 and last race was 38. So proud!!! Cuz hub PRed as well between us.

I think the best part was running without having to worry about extreme heat/humidity, nagging injury, or goal pace. Always love race days - the excitement, comeradery, and competition. This was a great cause, great location, good weather, and shared experience with family. Great way to do an "easy" 5k run on a Saturday morning!

A Study in Form

My wife got a great picture of me at my last 5k. I mean it was a great picture that I happened to be in, not that I am bragging about how I look in the picture. However, I am going to brag about how I look in the picture. It was just a few seconsd into the race (maybe a minute or two). It was long enough for me to get into the groove but not long enough for me to pull away from the pack of slower runners and firmly cement myself in the middle of the pack. The sun was just coming up over the trees which made a beautiful lens flare right above my head.

The best part of the picture was what it captured in my form - the fact that it existed. I knew it was very different from how I used to run and I wanted to quantify it. So I went on a search through my pictures from the Disney marathon to find the same point in my stride. There were 22 pictures that showed my feet. I figured one of them would be at the same point or at least close. None. Zilch. Nada. So I decided to go to the video tape and that's why I figured out why I couldn't find that position in my stride - because it wasn't there.

I don't mean that there were no pictures, I mean that portion of my stride did not exist. In my 5k pic, I am in mid air (or close to it). My back foot had just toed off (or was just about to). Going frame-by-frame through my marathon stride, that never happened. Not even in the first few miles. By the time my I was toeing off, my toe was up, heel thrusting out in that characteristic heel-striking position, and preparing to hit the ground. The reason I couldn't find a picture of me in mid-air was because I was never in mid-air.

Now, to be fair, I was running the fastest I had ever run for any mile since I PRed my opening mile in about 6:50. This would not be my pace if I tried to run a marathon today. However, I also can't discount the massive change in how I run in a mere 6 months.

So, that makes the picture my wife took extra-great to me!

I Am No Longer a Beginner

I was reading the latest issue of "Runner's World" when I realized I wasn't a beginner any more. Only a few years removed from my c25k and anything titled "Run Your First..." is not for me. I was excited because I'm training for my first half and this issue was all about training for your first half. The only problem is it assumes you have never run that distance. Since I already did a full, I've done that distance 9 times and since the last one was exactly double you could say I've done 13.1 10 times in the past year. Since running 13.1 isn't an issue for me, I was hoping to find some pearls of wisdom for experienced runners running their first half. No dice!

I'm not saying I know everything I need to know about running. My shins, knees, and calves give me occasional reminders that that isn't the case. However, I know everything I didn't know before I started running. That may sound obvious, but there is a finite amount of knowledge every runner must gain before they can recognize their proverbial ass from a hole in the ground. I believe I have made that leap.

For me, now, running is about putting my knowledge into action. I have my core set of running values which I follow (somewhat religiously). Having had some past success with my specific running dogma makes it a little easier to keep going. Having every run planned for me makes it easy too. I just stick to the plan and I run faster. For the most part I have remained injury free (knock on wood).

So I know something now, which is more than nothing.